From Bill O'Reilly's "Talking Points"

The Senate completely blew this. They're at fault. The American people don't want an 800 page immigration bill loaded with a bunch of bullfeathers. The folks want clarity and a fair deal.

So it's no surprise the Senate's deal collapsed into chaos. And that is a bad thing for America, because now we'll have more of the same. Millions of people trying to sneak into the country and the feds having no idea who is here and what they're doing. 

So right now, I'm going to give you the No Spin immigration solution. It is simple because, as you know, I am a simple man. There are just four components:

1) secure the southern border with 700, not 300 miles of barrier, double the border patrol and back them up with 10,000 National Guards people. That would effectively shut down human and drug smuggling from Mexico.

2) require all illegal aliens in the country right now to register at the post office with Homeland Security. After registering, they would be given a tamper proof ID card, designating their status and their right to work temporarily in the USA. If the illegal aliens do not register, it's a criminal felony. Right now sneaking across the border is a civil action. Remember that. Subjecting the person to immediate deportation or jail time. The criminal penalty goes way up.

3) Any business that hires an illegal worker who doesn't have a tamper proof ID card faces draconian fines and possible prison time for the executives.

4) Each illegal alien would have his case reviewed by federal authorities. And they would decide who would receive a Z-visa to stay and who would not. That takes the blanket amnesty, something many American hate, off the table. It also allows the feds to make rational decisions about who's helping America and who isn't.

Under that banner, no illegal alien who commits a crime while here would be allowed to stay. Also under that program, no welfare of any kind would be paid to folks here illegally. They'd have to work for their living.

Now that is a fair immigration plan that I believe would be acceptable to most Americans. It would also allow the feds to quickly build a database, so Homeland Security would know the extent of the alien intrusion, which we don't know now.

Again, any illegal alien who didn't cooperate with the new law would immediately become an outlaw. And immediate action could be taken against that non-citizen who doesn't comply. That would end the sanctuary city madness and give the federal government more tools to regain control over this out of control situation.

So there you have it — a fair plan to give good people a chance to stay here and earn citizenship down the road -- but a plan that also protects Americans. The No Spin immigration plan is, again, one page and not 800 pages. And it would work.

And that's "The Memo."

Or maybe this take which is enviornmentally correct but maybe not politically correct:

1) Dig a 700 mile trench between America and Mexico. This would take way less time than building a fence. Re-direct the Gulf of Mexico and the Pacific Ocean to keep it full.

2) Bring alligators from Florida where there is an overcrowing problem with them. Use off season farm laborers to do this. Also our prison populations could do this labor also.

3) All the money saved from not having to use 10,000 National Guard troops would pay for this. Also money saved by our government for not publishing anything in the Mexican language anymore would also defray the costs.

4) All of age teens that were not born here are required to serve in the military. Anyone already here that commits a crime has to swim back to Mexico.