Viewing 1 - 9 out of 85 Blogs.

Page:  1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Next >  Last >>

. . . IS ME!
. . . IS YOU!
. . . IS TOGETHER!
. . . FACING LIFES'
. . . CHOICES!CHALLENGES!
. . . BRAVEFULLY!
. . . IS LOVE!
. . . IS SHARED!
. . . IS SEPARATELY!
. . . IS HOPEFULLY
. . . IS EQUALLY!
. . . IS SUGGESSIVE!
. . . IS NOT FORCEFUL!
. . . IS NOT "ALL-KNOWING-SAYING-"I TOLD YOU!
. . .IS INVITING-ACCEPTING THE CHOICE-"I'LL HOLD YOU"!
. . .IS UNDERSTANDING!
. . . IS SHARED SECRETS - SHARED DREAMS - SHARED PAIN - SHARED TRUTHS!
. . . IS THE BALM THAT HEALS MANY HURTS!APPLIED EVER GENTLY!SOOTHENLY!WITH LOVE!
. . . IS NOT JUDGEMENTAL-SPITEFUL-EX-CLUSIVE "TO CAUSE HARM!
. . .ACCEPTIVE-SUPPORTIVE-INCLUSIVE-"MAINTAINS GROWTH"!
. . . IS SHARED JOY!SHARED LAUGHTER!SHARED FUN!
. . . IS SHARED TIME TOGETHER! DOING NOTHING IS FUN!
. . . IS SLOW TO ANGER AND SHAME!
. . . IS CAREFUL-LISTENS INTENTLY-SPEAKS PURPOSELY-NOT TO HURT!
. . . IS DEPENDABLE!TIMELY!AND TRUE!
. . .IS MORE PRECIOUS THAN GOLD OR SILVER! VALUE LIMITLESSLY WEALTH IS TRUE!
. . . IS MEANT TO BE SAVORED LIKE "FINE WINE"!
. . . IS VALUED "LIMITLESS" MORE PRICELESS WITH TIME!
. . . IS NOT PERFECT!MUCH LIKE ME! MUCH LIKE YOU! YOU'LL SEE!
. . . IS THE MOST EXPRESSIVE OF EXPERIENCES!ALLOWS ME TO BE! ALSO! ALLOWS YOU TO BE!
. . . LIMITLESS CHOICES!ALL SUBJECTIVELY!
. . . IS FORGIVING!DOES NOT HOLD GRUDGES OR DEMANDS!
. . . IS NOT JUDGEMENTAL-ACCEPTING-SUPPORTIVE_LOVINGLY CAN!
. . . IS THE OINMENT IN LIFE THAT MAKES WRONG THINGS BEARABLE!ALLOWS ME/YOU TO MOVE ON-TO ENJOYABLE!
. . . IS MEANT TO BE DRANK LIKE YOUR FAVORITE BEVERAGE ON A HOT SUMMERS' DAY!
. . . IS ALWAYS BESIDE YOU THRU PRESENCE - WHEN ABSENT "COME WHAT MAY"!
. . . IS SPONTANEOUS! HAPPENS WITHOUT THOUGHT!
. . . IS A GIFT GRACIOUSLY GIVEN AND RECEIVED!CAREFUL NUTURING "IS A MUST"!
. . . IS A ROAD TRAVELED CAREFULLY-TENDERLY-KINDLY-SLOW! SAVORING THE SECONDS-MINUTES-HOURS-DAYS!LOVINGLY SO!
. . . IS STRENGTH!WHEN WE ARE WEAK!YOU'RE WEAK! I'M WEAK! TOGETHER STRONG - YOU'LL SEE!
. . . IS CHERISHED MOMENTS! CHERISHED TIMES! CHERISHED EVENTS!
. . . IS CHERISHED MOMENTS OF LOVE-PAIN! SUNSHINE-RAIN! GOOD-BAD! TOGATHERNESS!
. . . IS ABLE TO CAREFULLY TOUCH YOUR HEART AND GENTLY GRASP YOUR SOUL!IMPRINTING LOVE FOREVER!
. . . IS AS REFRESHING AFTER A RAINSTORM ON A HOT MUGGY DAY!
. . . IS SUNSHINE THRU CLOUDS IN THE STORMS OF LIFE THAT MAY!
. . . IS RECEPTIVE!ALLOWING!CANNOT BE FORCED OR INDUCED!
. . . IS PLEASANT-RELAXED-PEACEFUL-SOOTHELINGLY LOVING TO YOU-TO ME! GIFT GIVEN FREELY!
. . . IS A "SHOULDER TO LEAN ON"!
.. . IS AN "EAT TO HEAR"!
. . . IE EVERLASTING! "GETS BETTER WITH AGE"!
. . . IS TEARS SHARED-WIPED AWAY GENTLY WITH LOVE!
. . . IS PAIN SHARED! EASED WITH EMPATHETIC STRENGTH - PRESENCE - AND LOVE!
. . . IS SHARED DREAMS! SHARED JOYS! SHARED HOPES! SHARED TRUTHS!
. . . IS SHARED LIKE!
. . . IS SHARED RESPECT!
. . . IS SHARED KINDNESS!
. . . IS SHARED TRUTHS!
. . . IS SHARED LOVE!
. . . IS LOVE SHARED!
. . . IS SHARED LOVE! LOVE SHARED!
. . . IS GIFTS GIVEN BETWEEN ME AND YOU!
. . . IS YOU!
. . . IS ME!

1 cup Courtesy 1/2 cup Patience 1/4 cup Forgiveness 2 cups Understanding 1 cup Encouragement 2 tsp. Unselfishness Stir in a pinch of Praise . Add a dash of Wit and Humor . Season with Faith and Confidence , Put it in a 16 x 9 pan, bake on 350° for a Lifetime and serve with generous portions of Love and Kindness

 

Can't remember if I told you that:

I have moved out from 1 Beggars Alley, located at 2 Poverty Lane, at the corner of Down and Out Circle. As of today, I have a brand new home.

My new address is Living Well on 3rd Abundance Drive , located at the corner of Blessings Street and Prosperity Peak . It's in the God Can neighborhood. No longer will I allow myself to travel to the other side of town on Begging Peter to Pay< /B> Paul Route, located at a dead end intersection called I Don't Have, which connects with Borrowers Junction.

I no longer hang out at Failure's Place, near Excuses Avenue, next to Procrastination Point. I've moved to an upscale community called Higher Heights with unlimited potential and opportunities for me to succeed. I can do ALL things through my Higher Power who strengthens me!

Life is good because God is good! Care to change your address? There are many vacancies!

GREAT IS THY FAITHFULLNESS! I AM WELL BLESSED AND SO ARE YOU, in spite of temporary circumstances!!!!!!

DON'T TELL GOD HOW BIG YOUR STORMS ARE, TELL YOUR STORMS HOW BIG YOUR GOD IS!!

May God Richly Bless each and Everyone That Reads This -Please Keep in touch!

I received this is an e-mail from my brother and thought you guys would get a kick out of it! To be very honest, I can still be found where I've always never been found before...???

Click Here! drop in to wish me Happy Birthday http://friendsforcash.com/Texasladydee

If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the! police man's credibility... Q: 'Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?' A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.' Q: 'Officer -- who provided this description?' A: 'The officer who responded to the scene.' Q: 'A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?' A: 'Yes, sir. With my life.' Q: 'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?' A: 'Yes sir, we do!' Q: 'And do you have a locker in the room?' A: 'Yes sir, I do.' Q: 'And do you have a lock on your locker?' A: 'Yes sir.' Q: 'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?' A: 'You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.' The courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's 'Best Comeback' line -- and we think he'll win

This CBS News video not only explains just how much more gas costs in the UK compared to here in the US - $9 a gallon! It also explains in layman's terms some of the factors behind the surging oil prices and the sagging dollar. So it's not just you America that is struggling to live with crazy gas prices, Europe has always had expensive gas - but this is getting ridiculous, especially for the cab drivers. The main difference in how the two landmasses are handling this crisis is that much of Europe has very good public transportation as well as established freight rail. Even though there are more trucks on the road than ever, Europeans are not nearly as dependant upon their cars and trucks as the US. Many Europeans do not even need to own a car, and those that do are not driving 8 cylinder Cadillacs. Here in America not only does everyone own a car, but many of us would be stranded without them - public transportation is a joke outside the largest cities. Not to mention that giant, dirty and inefficient Semi-Trailers haul a major portion of our food and goods that were once hauled by freight rail.

1. Cows 2. The Constitution 3. The Ten Commandments *COWS *Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow. *THE CONSTITUTION *They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore. *THE 10 COMMANDMENTS *The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: You cannot post 'Thou Shalt Not Steal,' 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery,' and 'Thou Shall Not Lie' in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.

[H&R Block, editor's note: The following is a real letter submitted to the IRS in the midst of last year's weird and bizarre denial of dependents, exemptions, and credits. We believe the letter speaks for itself.] Dear Sirs: I am responding to your letter denying the deduction for two of the three dependents I claimed on my 1994 Federal Tax return. Thank you. I have questioned whether these are my children or not for years. They are evil and expensive. It's only fair that since they are minors and not my responsibility that the government (who evidently is taxing me more to care for these waifs) knows something about them and what to expect over the next year. You may apply next year to reassign them to me and reinstate the deduction. This year they are yours! The oldest, Kristen, is now 17. She is brilliant. Ask her! I suggest you put her to work in your office where she can answer people's questions about their returns. While she has no formal training, it has not seemed to hamper her knowledge of any other subject you can name. Taxes should be a breeze; Next year she is going to college. I think it's wonderful that you will now be responsible for that little expense. While you mull that over keep in mind that she has a truck. It doesn't run at the moment so you have the immediate decision of appropriating some Department of Defense funds to fix the vehicle or getting up early to drive her to school. Kristen also has a boyfriend. Oh joy. While she possesses all of the wisdom of the universe, her alleged mother and I have felt it best to occasionally remind her of the virtues of abstinence, and in the face of overwhelming passion, safe sex. This is always uncomfortable and I am quite relieved you will be handling this in the future. May I suggest that you reinstate Joycelyn Elders, who had a rather good handle on the problem. Patrick is 14. I've had my suspicions about this one. His eyes are a little close together for normal people. He may be a tax examiner himself one day if you do not incarcerate him first. In February I was awakened at three in the morning by a police officer who was bringing Pat home. He and his friends were TP'ing houses. In the future would you like him delivered to the local IRS office or to Ogden, UT? Kids at 14 will do almost anything on a dare. His hair is purple. Permanent dye, temporary dye, what's the big deal? Learn to deal with it. You'll have plenty of time as he is sitting out a few days of school after instigating a food fight. I'll take care of filing your phone number with the vice principal. Oh yes, he and all of his friends have raging hormones. This is the house of testosterone and it will be much more peaceful when he lives in your home. DO NOT leave any of them unsupervised with girls, explosives, inflammables, inflatables, vehicles, or telephones. (I'm sure that you will find telephones a source of unimaginable amusement, and be sure to lock out the 900 and 976 numbers!) Heather is an alien. She slid through a time warp and appeared quite by magic one year. I'm sure this one is yours. She is 10 going on 21. She came from a bad trip in the sixties. She wears tie-dyed clothes, beads, sandals, and hair that looks like Tiny Tim's. Fortunately you will be raising my taxes to help offset the pinch of her remedial reading courses. Hooked On Phonics is expensive so the schools dropped it. Good news! You can buy it yourself for half the amount of the deduction that you are denying! It's quite obvious that we were terrible parents (ask the other two) so they have helped raise this one to a new level of terror. She cannot speak English. Most people under twenty understand the curious patois she fashioned out of valley girls/boys in the hood/reggae/yuppie/political doublespeak. I don't. The school sends her to a speech pathologist who has her roll her R's. It added a refreshing Mexican/Irish touch to her voice. She wears hats backwards, pants baggy and wants one of her ears pierced four more times. There is a fascination with tattoos that worries me but I am sure that you can handle it. Bring a truck when you come to get her, as she sort of "nests" in her room and I think that it would be easier to move the entire thing than find out what it is really made of. You denied two of the three exemptions so it is only fair you get to pick which two you will take. I prefer that you take the youngest, I still go bankrupt with Kristen's college but then I am free! If you take the two oldest then I still have time for counseling before Heather becomes a eenager. If you take the two girls then I won't feel so bad about putting Patrick in a military academy. Please let me know of your decision as soon as possible as I have already increased the withholding on my W-4 to cover the $395 in additional tax and to make a down payment on an airplane. Yours Truly, Robert W

On the first day, God created the dog and said: 'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.' The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?' So God agreed. On the second day, God created the monkey and said: 'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.' The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?' And God agreed. On the third day, God created the cow and said: 'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.' The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?' And God agreed again. On the fourth day, God created man and said: 'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.' But man said: 'Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?' 'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.' So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service

Key Words: Jokes

Page:  1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Next >  Last >>